Wednesday, January 5, 2011

10 best ways to do the dishes



10. Set dishes to soak and promptly forget about them.

9. Wash one dish, watch movie, repeat.

8. Two words: Shot put. 

7. Place in front of animals (or in a pinch small children) and let them have at it.

6. Two more words: Clay pigeons. 

5. Turn dishes into an abstract art sculpture.

4. Play an improv drum session. 

3. Blog top ten lists as a way of putting it off. 

2. Wait 15 minutes to see if the world will end so you don't have to, then wait 10 more minutes.

1. Burn down the sink.

Posted by TS Hendrik
at 11:47 AM
Labels:

27 comments:

  1. CorruptCamel.comJanuary 5, 2011 at 11:52 AM

    I just lay down newspapers and eat off those. When it's toilet time, the newspapers are still there for me.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Contemplating CadieJanuary 5, 2011 at 11:53 AM

    Now tell me something I don't know.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Alex J. CavanaughJanuary 5, 2011 at 12:08 PM

    #9 sounds like me, but I like the idea of clay pigeons!

    ReplyDelete
  4. BuddJanuary 5, 2011 at 12:18 PM

    paper plates or the politically incorrect "get married"

    ReplyDelete
  5. MarleneJanuary 5, 2011 at 12:59 PM

    Buy a dishwasher, dude! :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. jcohen7523January 5, 2011 at 2:22 PM

    Oh Melvin, have you been sneaking into the #1 slot of a top ten count?

    ReplyDelete
  7. TS HendrikJanuary 5, 2011 at 3:06 PM

    Cotton, The movie It's a Wonderful Life was based upon a short story written in a greeting card by a guy who mostly wrote civil war non-fiction. Did you know that?

    Marlene, I have one, but don't use it. Besides, that still requires not being lazy, which is fundamentally the underlying issue behind the post.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Suciô SanchezJanuary 5, 2011 at 4:24 PM

    I use paper plates. Et voilà!

    ReplyDelete
  9. CopyboyJanuary 5, 2011 at 4:36 PM

    oops. the jcohen7523 comment was me.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Mister SharafJanuary 5, 2011 at 4:45 PM

    hate dishes but your way is cool :D

    ReplyDelete
  11. Reputation@StakeJanuary 5, 2011 at 5:09 PM

    You use dishes? Weird. What about cups? Do you (correctly) drink right from the container or (incorrectly) use a cup? Please tell me you don't use those strange shaped things with handles ... those, uh ... utan, utin, uten, utensils. Yeah, those.

    ReplyDelete
  12. UnknownJanuary 5, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    Burning down the sink is my favorite way. Second favorite: Waiting for them to clean themselves.

    ReplyDelete
  13. ChuckJanuary 5, 2011 at 7:17 PM

    I have two words for you...paper plates.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Brad StanleyJanuary 5, 2011 at 7:39 PM

    #1 sounds like a possible slogan for the dinosaur political party??

    I could definitely picture dinos chanting that.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Pat TillettJanuary 5, 2011 at 8:00 PM

    my wife likes to cook, but hates dishes. I eat, therefore I wash...
    I know this is sick, but I really don't mind. I wonder why she doesn't do the dishes when I cook?

    ReplyDelete
  16. Rek SeshJanuary 6, 2011 at 12:52 AM

    Well, a labour intensive third world country has its perks...a part time maid to do the cleaning...feel bad for them but it keeps their kids in school and a roof over their heads...so its a bad compromise I guess...Besides I do clean some of it myself...

    ReplyDelete
  17. ericsJanuary 6, 2011 at 1:13 AM

    why didn't i ever think to burn down the sink.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Adorably DeadJanuary 6, 2011 at 3:22 AM

    I have two dogs, I like the animal method.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ashley KingJanuary 6, 2011 at 1:14 PM

    i love this!!!! we have a dishwasher, but half of the dishes can't be washed in the dishwasher. i'm afraid of ruining them (or the pots and pans, really).... and then it takes too long to fill up.... so i just fill up one side of the sink with REALLY hot water and soap, rinse the dishes in the other side, drop them in the hot water and soap side and leave them.....

    eventually the water turns ice cold, the dishes still need to be washed, and i just leave them there, until jason (or myself) gets irritated enough to actually do them....

    i HATE the dishes.... hate hate hate them.... i hate soggy hands too.

    ReplyDelete
  20. KalJanuary 6, 2011 at 2:04 PM

    I hate hate hate doing dishes with a passion. In the six months when I didn't have a dish washer I used only paper plates and plastic utensils. We should all just have replicaters that deal with the leftovers and the dishes at the same time.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Alex J. CavanaughJanuary 7, 2011 at 8:34 AM

    Awesome award waiting for you, sir!

    ReplyDelete
  22. AllyJanuary 7, 2011 at 9:59 AM

    Dude, I hate doing dishes. My husband has this deal where he cooks (uses every plate, fork and spoon he can find) and I do dishes. I'd rather cook to be honest!

    ReplyDelete
  23. FairfieldHouseJanuary 7, 2011 at 11:49 AM

    Or just invest in a dish washer and then make a Top Ten List on Ways to Empty it!

    Deborah

    PS When I was in college I knew someone that filled a tub, turned on the shower to wash dishes. Needless to say, I never ate or showered there.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I Like Horror MoviesJanuary 8, 2011 at 11:02 AM

    I like to cover them in a tablecloth and then pull it away quickly to see if they disappear.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Rawknrobyn.blogspot.comJanuary 9, 2011 at 5:13 PM

    I've had fights with former roommates and the (ex) spouse regarding my dishwashing skills, er, lack thereof. I plan to default to #2 in the future. That one's my favorite.
    xoRobyn

    ReplyDelete
  26. Powdered Toast ManJanuary 10, 2011 at 5:13 AM

    I tried burning down the sink. My mom got really pissed.

    ReplyDelete
  27. LorraineJanuary 14, 2011 at 9:08 AM

    My mom used to hate how much I manged to get down in between washing each individual plate. It's like for every item I washed, I needed a week vacation. She? Was not a happy camper.

    Oh well! Dishes suck.

    Lorraine

    ReplyDelete

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