True Confessions Vol.2: The Wonder Years

I have a dark secret to divulge. Something I've kept hidden for many years and only now in front of you feel it's okay to speak openly about. It's a very sensitive subject but here goes.

Confession Number 2: The Wonder Years

I've never hid the fact that I was a somewhat odd child. While other kids were running around screaming, I sat quietly and pondered why they were so loud. I also had what could be considered a very vivid imagination. A blessing while telling stories and a curse at night when going to sleep. As such, bizarre things used to give me the shivers. While my pro-Boy Meets World, anti-The Wonder Years stance has been known for years, one of the reasons hasn't.

The Wonder Years used to freak me out.

Not in the traditional scary horror sort of way. Something about the tone of the show; the way it was narrated and the way the sound had this almost muted quality, just seemed eery to me. It was the same feeling I got when I watched claymation. What? You don't find claymation creepy? Try watching Davy and Goliath at 5am in the morning before the sun is up and the house is quiet. They may be preaching Christian values, but that doesn't mean they don't want to eat you, just a little.

I was like that as a kid though. Odd things would give me nightmares. While The Wonder Years never produced any bad dreams, for some reason it left me feeling unsettled. You know that scene in Miracle Mile where the helicopter lands in the La Brea Tar Pits? The feeling I got watching the show was like a lesser version of the feeling I had during that scene. A sense of finality. Now I find that scene laughable but when you're 8 it's terrifying.

Course, I suppose a little self analysis might suggest that fearing a show about reliving the past would be in effect fearing aging. Which would in turn suggest ultimately a fear of time itself. A really deep and mature fear for a kid of that age to have. One might say that I had an old wise soul.

Okay, so as a 6 year old I thought Kevin's father and mother looked like angry monsters. But it sounds better the other way.

Still, fair is fair, so the other night, with the lights out I watched a few episodes of the show. As an adult who doesn't really fear anything anymore (except for claymation monsters coming to life) I figured to give it a fair shake. This time around it didn't scare me at all. I was too bored to feel anything else.

So that's my second confession. I find The Wonder Years boring. I understand if some of you feel like shunning me after this.