Battle of the Shapes: The Winner

We are here to announce that the winner of Battle of the Shapes, and the newly crowned “Greatest of all shapes” is … hold on, I dropped the envelope … okay, here we go. The winner is … how do you get these things open? Ouch! Man, now I’ve got a paper cut. Hang on a sec. I need to go get a band-aid … thanks, alright, now, how do get these band-aids open? Oh, there we go. Gently. Good, yeah that’s nice. Okay, let’s open this envelope more carefully. There we go. Ha, got it. And the winner is … oops, I dropped some blood on it. Uh, I can’t read it now. Anyone have another copy? What? Dude, you’re going to have to whisper louder, I could barely hear that. Say it again. Oh, really? That’s who won. Great. Well, congratulations! That’s wonderful! Thanks to all the participants who participat—what is it now? Oh, I didn’t say it already? Sorry. Well, I was planning on congratulating Circle again at the end, so they would have figured it out then. Oh, fine. The winner is Squa— no, Circle. Sorry, yes, Circle. Congrats again. Can I get some champagne up here?

Alright, move. Get off the stage. Sorry everybody. He will be fired, don’t worry. And yes, the winner was Circle. So how about a big round of applause? Yes, yes, it deserves it. Thank you. Its road to victory was quite impressive, and included a rather easy romp over Pentagon (but it was mostly polite about it), from which it moved on to an absolute decimation of triangle (it bragged a bit over that one—but the party was good), and finally it took down Square, where it gave Box-boy such a beating that Boxy came out looking like an octagon. So, somewhat understandably, Circle was able to gain the crown fairly easily. Being the first shape that many kids first learn to draw, as well as the most abundant shape in the universe, it was probably to be expected. (Though Lens and Septagon are both particularly bitter over the results.) So, congratulations once again to Circle, the undisputed Greatest Shape!